DesignKitty

Angela and I bought Grand Theft Auto IV when it came out. No, we didn’t wait outside of Best Buy and snatched it at midnight on release day. We have work, you know. We did, however, pick it up later on release day. There were plenty of copies.

Due to work and my schedule, I didn’t get the chance to play with it at all. It took me at least another 2 days until I was able to unpack it and load it onto our PS3. What I got was pretty cool and interesting.

Let me preface this by saying that I got my PS2 for my birthday a number of years ago. The first game that I got for it was GTA3. Rob hooked it up to the tv for me while I was off on a drunken binge. I played that game and finished most of the missions. It was good times. I had the same problem with that game that I have with GTA4: Driving.

When I say ‘driving’, I don’t mean driving in the game. Sure, I suck driving in the game. Then again, I have no problem with it because I can ram right through things. My problem with driving happens when I’m not even playing the game. The issue I have is that when I’m behind the wheel in my car I’m expecting the in-game physics to kick in.

My video game world intersects with the real world and it isn’t pretty.

Car handling in GTA4 is really crap, especially with the low end cars that you start off with. If you want to make a turn the odds of you losing control and drifting are pretty high, even if you use the brake. I normally use the reverse button + brake + accelerator while making a high speed turn. No matter what I do, I tend to either spin out or lurch along like Jerry Lewis.

When I climb into my truck or Angela’s 350, I’m expecting the same type of mushy handling. I’ve also considered driving into/through things that I normally would in the game. That mailbox? I’m sure I could plow through it with my Jeep. That street lamp? Child’s play! I could take out least 6 of those and the 350 would be fine!

It is a pretty bad problem with me. Taking turns I start to get jittery and I keep waiting for my back end to slide out. I’m always at the ready to compensate for the poor handling of a video game car while in the real world.

It is reminiscent of what it was like when I first played Katamari Damacy. I wanted to keep walking around town collecting things in a big massive ball.

Hmmm…if I’m having these types of problems with games maybe I should download a dating sim from jlist.

Work with me here. I know some of you smoke. I’ll be honest - when I drink I occaissionally smoke maybe a cigarette, possibly a cigar. I also know some of you have kids. I know some of you even have kids who smoke (teens, not toddlers). I also know that those of you with young children are trying to save them from the ill effects of second hand smoke.

I live in the great state of Virginia in the United States of America. Over the past four years there have been initiatives underway to ban smoking from restaurants. In Maryland and the District of Columbia they’ve already passed bans on smoking in restaurants. Patrons are happy, people no longer smell of smoke when going out and all of the segregated seating has been abolished. There are no special tables for customers who want to smoke, away from those that don’t. All seating is equal.

Still with me? Good. I propose that they bring that seating back.

The theory is simple: people with children avoided the smoking areas of the restaurants like the plague. That meant two very important things

• there was always a little extra seating if you could put up with the smoke
• there were no children

If a smoking ban takes place then please make them child-free zones. I like going into a restaurant and saying ‘I’ll take a smoking table’ and going straight in while others are standing around waiting for a smoke-free table. I like that there are rarely, if any, children there so that I could eat without yelling or crying or someone misbehaving.

Listen, we all make decisions with our lives. If you have children, great. More power to you. You have my utmost admiration. Me? I don’t have children right now by choice. But why should I have to suffer through my meal when your kids are throwing a temper tantrum or talking loudly?

Newsflash - everyone doesn’t like kids.

Much like people don’t like how smoking ruins their dining experience, I don’t like children ruining mine. I don’t like them running around, I don’t like them kicking or bouncing in the booth behind me, I don’t like them whining. You don’t like someone killing themself by lighting up a cig, I don’t like someone with bad parenting skills.

All I’m asking is that if you take away smoking areas then convert them to child-free zones. Toss me a bone, here, folks. Something like the Victoria and Alberts at the Grand Floridian at Walt Disney World.

Yes, Ladies and Gents! I have just done the unimaginable! The amazing! The never thought possible! I have just broken a NEW WORLD RECORD!

Ok, well, I suppose it is more of a personal record than a World Record. I’ve been married to the same woman for the past 5 years

To celebrate we went to the Smithsonian’s Udvar-Hazy Air & Space Museum. This place is literally no more than 10 minutes from our house. We’ve been meaning to go for the longest time. We finally got the gumption to go. The place houses so many historically significant aircraft. The only problem? You don’t get to go inside. None of them. Zero. Zip. Zilch. It was a tad boring. I wanted to at least get into a replica of the Enola Gay or the Space Shuttle. Instead you’re relegated to looking at them from a distance.

It was, for the most part, pretty boring. Until we happened upon a lost little toy, sitting in a chair all by herself. We decided to make the Air & Space museum a little more interesting - we took this toy, who had the name Emma written under her head - and made her our tour guide. Below are the pictures of the mighty Emma and the various vehicles and exhibits at the museum.

Look! We even found her a boyfriend!

Afterwards we went home, freshened up and then we went to Wiseacres in Tyson’s. The headliner was Adam Dodd and he was really pretty good. All in all, we had a pretty good day! No fights, no broken limbs, all the pets are still alive and we’re still married!

If I ever get around to rescheduling my paintball outing I know that there are at least two things that I’m going to want to bring with me:

A mini-gun
I hear that some of the more powerful and intricately designed mini-guns rely on multiple battery packs. I also think that a custom feed would be needed so as not to chop balls and, well, quantity. The Proto Rail Guns shoot at about 30bps. I’m not exactly sure what this thing shoots but I would love to pound someone with it.

A Tank
Of course you’ll need something to off-set the advantage of the minigun. So what would you bring to the party? Why a Panzer, of course!

Odds are, though, that I’ll bring neither and I’ll be stuck at home playing with Beamz

http://designkitty.com/?p=190
http://designkitty.com/?p=191
http://designkitty.com/?p=192

It is really, really hard to believe that a year has already passed. I wish today would end. I keep finding myself about to fall into a weeping lump of cry baby.

It is taking everything in my power to keep myself busy and to keep my mind off things.